2 am

Melanie —  February 8, 2011

Well,  after tossing and turning for 2 hrs. I decided to get up to get a change of scenery.  Since I last posted, I have had a few better nights of sleep and some bad ones.  Generally I am feeling exhausted during the day due to the lack of sleep but God has been so amazing in giving me the strength I need.  I am not feeling as down as I was last week.  In fact, today was a really great day.  I woke with a horrible migraine but amazingly, it was gone by 11am – incredible.  I praise God for that.  I so enjoyed being with my children today.  It was beautiful here and after schooling and lunch, we went out for a bike ride (I walked) and ended up riding all the way to the big park in Chippenham.  It’s kind of humorous that it was our first time there since we’ve moved here yet we visited it multiple times before we actually lived in Chippenham.  Aliyah reminded me today that it was at this park that we told the kids which house we were moving to (we had looked at 2).  I can’t believe we’ve lived here for 6 months already.  Time does fly.  Anyway, we had such a nice time out together and we’re all excited now for spring to come.  It was so lovely to hear the birds singing, see the snowdrops starting to come out and soak up that nice vitamin D from the sun.  I had a nice long phone chat with a friend this afternoon about possible curriculum for next year’s schooling and then tonight we had homegroup at our house.  It was a really great evening focusing on the cross and the resurrection.  Peter was in London today for a meeting so didn’t get home til late.  We had a nice chat and then . . . no sleep for me.  I don’t feel really stressed, just very tired.  Beyond tired really.  I am not sure how much longer I can keep going with so little sleep.  Well, I guess having had 4 newborns, I could go for quite a long time still! 🙂  Except I don’t have the sweet little baby to inspire me that it’s worth it!  I felt like I could’ve slept at 7pm tonight so I don’t know what is going on.  I just really want to be the best mom I can be for the children and they deserve a mom that can think straight and not be irritable at them all the time!  I mentioned before that I had a change in medication and it could be that now the other supplements I am taking are too strong and causing the insomnia.  It’s really so strange.   I thought I would ask for prayer again as last time I did, it made a huge difference!!  Please pray for wisdom to adjust my supplements if necessary, for me not to despair but to be at peace and to trust fully in Him.  He shows His strength best in our weakness.  I know He’s got a purpose for this time of difficult sleeping.  Peter is taking the day off tomorrow as he will be gone all day Saturday, so I am hoping to get some time to post Aliyah’s birthday photos. Watch this space Grandmas and Aunties!  Thanks so much for praying.